Does This Baby Make Me Look Fat?

I'm depressed.  I have already gained 20 pounds so far and I'm just over 22 weeks along.  According to the guidelines, I'm "a bit ahead of schedule."  The baby isn't even one pound, yet my check up last week showed that I gained nine pounds from last month to this one.

Does her mullet add a pound or two?

I guess I'll have to tone down the eating now that the holidays are over.  No more of these kinds of conversations:

"I'm going to finish the apple pie, okay?" I inform Nate.
"Split that apple pie in half and share it."  He gives me that you already ate your extra 300 calories today look.  I ignore the look while I reluctantly cut the pie fairly evenly down the middle, but I scoop the larger piece out of the pie tin and into my hand.  I lift it up to my mouth and Nate sees me chomp down, enjoying it like a giant slice of pizza.
"You don't want a plate?" he says.
"No.  Do you?"
"Um, yeah...And a fork."