Needless to say, these past nine months have been nothing short of stressful. Being pregnant has this way of intensifying everything else that goes on in my life. We ended the bike trip in Colorado early last August, and I was fully expecting to go back to my former job at the elementary school I taught at just a few weeks after finishing the trip. Unfortunately, I was involuntarily transferred to a middle school for reasons I'll never fully know. I cried for weeks about this, which probably should have been my first clue that I was pregnant. Then in October, my dad passed away, leaving me with this indescribable loss in the midst of something so exciting in my life. I think about him lots, and his picture is on our fridge, right next to the ultrasound pictures of our baby.
All the while, this year at work has been the most stressful thing I've experienced yet. Being at a new school, teaching curricula that I haven't taught since my student teaching days, and dealing with the craziness of middle school students brought on feelings of complete inadequacy. I ended my 7th hour class on an almost daily basis feeling utterly defeated, trying hard to fight back tears and compose myself before 8th hour began. I tried everything I could think of to make my 7th hour class tolerable, and I got nowhere. Almost the entire staff knew about the yahoos that were in that class, and they would just shake their heads in sympathy. Administration wasn't much help, either. I continued to try so hard to rise above it, coming home and bawling to Nate about my frustrations. To relieve the stress, I'd follow the guidelines that were suggested: exercising, eating well, getting enough sleep, etc.
Months of this, coupled with not sleeping at night, turned into a nasty cycle... I routinely woke up at 2 or 3 in the morning to go to the bathroom, or for no reason at all. And then the thinking would start... What else can I do to make work better? I couldn't turn the thinking off, despite trying to fall back asleep. I'd be up for a couple of hours, occasionally falling asleep right before I had to wake up to go to work.
In early March, Nate had had enough: "Why can't your turn your brain off?" Good question--I didn't know how to answer that. He suggested that I talk to our midwife and let her know what was going on at work. I really didn't want to; I suppose because that meant that I wasn't tough enough. But what was I trying to prove? That I could make it through to the end? I know about opinions, and I didn't want people forming one about me and my "inability" to work.
But, at the urging of Nate and my mom, I told the midwife at my last appointment (I actually started bawling even before I could say anything), and she talked to me about the risk of preterm labor for women who are stressed during their pregnancy and not sleeping enough. She put in orders for modified bed rest, which basically means that I'm supposed to take it easy and not work. I was off all last week, and will be until the baby comes. And guess what? I slept through the night after my last day of work. I've been feeling well-rested and less anxious about the birth. I'm calmer, which is a wonderful feeling to have. Sure, I've had to endure some people's comments and opinions about this: "You think this is not sleeping? Just wait, honey." Ultimately, it's the best decision for me and the baby, and I'm glad I did it.
Monday, March 28, 2011
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
Charting the Belly: Week 34 (almost 35)
I. Am. Feeling. Big.
It'll be 35 weeks this Thursday, and I suspect like every other pregnant woman at this point in her pregnancy, I am ready to get this baby out. But I've got some time to go, and some room to grow. I had Nate take some pictures this morning, and I was disgusted with every one of them. I couldn't bring myself to post them because it looked as though my face was pumped up with helium. So, we tried again this evening, and I didn't look at the camera.
I have read everything about the next five weeks in preparation for light at the end of the tunnel (before the next adventure of parenting). The highlights? Read on:
"Your baby will spend the next few weeks putting on weight."
Awesome. As if topping the scale at 200 pounds isn't exciting enough.
"Your ballooning uterus is crowding your other internal organs."
Like my lungs, my bladder, my stomach, and any muscles that used to help me put on my shoes and pick up stuff off the floor.
"You may have trouble sleeping at night."
Really? No kidding.
It'll be 35 weeks this Thursday, and I suspect like every other pregnant woman at this point in her pregnancy, I am ready to get this baby out. But I've got some time to go, and some room to grow. I had Nate take some pictures this morning, and I was disgusted with every one of them. I couldn't bring myself to post them because it looked as though my face was pumped up with helium. So, we tried again this evening, and I didn't look at the camera.
 |
| I'm picking lint off of my shirt |
I have read everything about the next five weeks in preparation for light at the end of the tunnel (before the next adventure of parenting). The highlights? Read on:
"Your baby will spend the next few weeks putting on weight."
Awesome. As if topping the scale at 200 pounds isn't exciting enough.
"Your ballooning uterus is crowding your other internal organs."
Like my lungs, my bladder, my stomach, and any muscles that used to help me put on my shoes and pick up stuff off the floor.
"You may have trouble sleeping at night."
Really? No kidding.
Rocking Chair
In the hopes that we can continue to use our rocking chair as a functional piece of furniture well after the baby (and its subsequent siblings??) is/are grown up, Nate and I decided to purchase an Eames Case Study Rocker from Modernica. It's not an original, but it's as close to the original as you can get. It's a fiberglass shell with the same molds that Ray and Charles Eames used in 1948.
At this point, I don't fully appreciate nor understand how cool this chair is. I don't come from a design background that would help me wrap my head around our purchase, but Nate and Jeff both think it's a great start to what could end up being a sweet furniture collection.
 |
| Daddy-to-Be |
Monday, March 21, 2011
Registry Fun Times
The other night, after hearing for the umpteenth time from my mother, "You need to add more to your registry," my two cousins (who are both moms themselves), offered to register items for me. Because the biggest problem with figuring out what I need for this baby lies in the fact that I simply don't know what I need, I jumped on the offer and quickly logged them in. In a matter of thirty minutes, Cindy and Angie had gone through almost every category at BuyBuy Baby, asking me questions along the way, and filled up the registry.
"Get as many receiving blankets as you can from the hospital. Those swaddle the best."
"Don't register for any more newborn sizes."
"You'll be doing laundry all the time, so get as many burping cloths as you can."
It was way less stressful than the hours I had spent thinking about what I needed and agonizing over of the fact that I simply had no idea what I needed.
"Get as many receiving blankets as you can from the hospital. Those swaddle the best."
"Don't register for any more newborn sizes."
"You'll be doing laundry all the time, so get as many burping cloths as you can."
It was way less stressful than the hours I had spent thinking about what I needed and agonizing over of the fact that I simply had no idea what I needed.
Sunday, March 13, 2011
April Showers
Last weekend, my "family" from the elementary school I worked at for three years (before I was unexpectedly and involuntarily transferred last August) threw me a baby shower. It was still March, so the title of this post is a bit misleading...
Anyway, it was so much fun to see the many amazing teachers that I spent most of the past three years of my life with. They all took time out of their weekend to celebrate the fact that I'm having a baby--a baby that no one's even met yet, but is truly excited about. Being the emotional person I am these days, I came home from the shower exhausted and weepy.
Nate: "Honey, why are you crying?" This seems to be a standard question from him these days.
We were surrounded by onesies, toys, receiving blankets, leftover cake, and mounds of tissue paper, and I was sitting there with tears pouring down my face. I blubbered, "This past year has been stressful being in a new building and away from the work family that I had come to know and depend upon. I miss them!"
Sure, it's sad being away from them, but I think I just had this tremendous feeling of gratitude for the fact that even though I don't work with them anymore, they all chose to be a part of such an amazing time in my life. Thanks, Pershing.
Anyway, it was so much fun to see the many amazing teachers that I spent most of the past three years of my life with. They all took time out of their weekend to celebrate the fact that I'm having a baby--a baby that no one's even met yet, but is truly excited about. Being the emotional person I am these days, I came home from the shower exhausted and weepy.
Nate: "Honey, why are you crying?" This seems to be a standard question from him these days.
We were surrounded by onesies, toys, receiving blankets, leftover cake, and mounds of tissue paper, and I was sitting there with tears pouring down my face. I blubbered, "This past year has been stressful being in a new building and away from the work family that I had come to know and depend upon. I miss them!"
Sure, it's sad being away from them, but I think I just had this tremendous feeling of gratitude for the fact that even though I don't work with them anymore, they all chose to be a part of such an amazing time in my life. Thanks, Pershing.
Aches and Pains
The past two weeks have provided some phenomenal insight into the world of sciatic nerve pain. One website describes it as coming on suddenly, causing immediate distress. I would say that's an understatement. I have woken up in the middle of the night on several occasions in agony, as if my entire left side were on fire. Thankfully, it doesn't happen every night and it seems to be only when I lie on my left side. I spoke to my midwife about the increasing pain I was experiencing, and she referred me to a physical therapist. I was able to get in last Monday, and she spent about 45 minutes with me, giving me several exercises to do to strengthen my hips. The weight of Mr. Belvedere puts pressure on this nerve, which causes the irritation.
I also have a small hole in my abdominal muscles (diastasis recti), which is a common symptom in pregnancy, so she gave me some exercises to do to correct that. I've been pretty diligent about doing these simple exercises and so far, I've been feeling better. I haven't awoken to the excruciating pain in the past six days, but I do notice that I'm sore in my hips in a different way, perhaps due to the exercises that I'm doing. Who knows.
Those Braxton-Hicks contractions are happening more and more frequently, in preparation for labor. They are so weird--like my belly is tightening up in a giant abdominal crunch. They don't hurt, but they can be uncomfortable. I almost always get them right after I stand up from sitting down, which makes for some awkward first steps when trying to walk.
I also have a small hole in my abdominal muscles (diastasis recti), which is a common symptom in pregnancy, so she gave me some exercises to do to correct that. I've been pretty diligent about doing these simple exercises and so far, I've been feeling better. I haven't awoken to the excruciating pain in the past six days, but I do notice that I'm sore in my hips in a different way, perhaps due to the exercises that I'm doing. Who knows.
Those Braxton-Hicks contractions are happening more and more frequently, in preparation for labor. They are so weird--like my belly is tightening up in a giant abdominal crunch. They don't hurt, but they can be uncomfortable. I almost always get them right after I stand up from sitting down, which makes for some awkward first steps when trying to walk.
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)